So whatcha heard...

3/02/2006
-Any of you in a band or interested in being in a band this Liars interview will shed a lot of light into the creative process and music industry in general. We will let the Liars speak for themselves: Liars Interview
-We are currently busy recording in our newly setup studio called gs. We have been experimenting with the acoustics of the room, microphone placement, with effects, our instruments, and computers to find truly original sounds.
-We are planning on adding samples of our work in various stages on our music page for you all to enjoy.
-Child is the father of the man...

2/17/2006
-The Guins have written a song that goes perfectly with the Olympics called Faster, Better. (This is a special live version with talking to start).
-Check out this bonus video for our live version of Ready To Go.
-Please feel free to update our Guin-wiki page. Click on the Guin-wiki link top left.

2/13/2006
-Thanks to all of you who tuned in to hear us on WMUC on Sunday night. The entire broadcast will be available on this site soon under our Music link.
-Dan is a human radio station.
-Happy 27th Birthday Adam! (Adam is one of Dan's younger brothers)
-Thanks to Bridgette and Red for being enthusiastic interviewers and not laughing when we advocated our views of musical cubism on the radio.
-There is a rumor going around that there will be a new indie venue in or around the College Park area soon. Good luck gentlemen and gentle women...

2/08/2006
-The Guins would like to welcome you all to come and sit on our fence. It's actually quite comfortable.

1/30/2006
-We will play the Third Rail radio show Feb.12th just as the nifty title bar above exclaims!
-Development and Terra Luna will be playing during a runway show sponsored by Destination U during NYC's fashion week.
-Thanks to all that came to our DC9 show specifically, Tigertronic, TelOgraph, Five-Four, some Cobblers, and of course those closer to us..!
-Cheers to SoftComplex for asking us to play with them and wooing our hearts with their music.

1/17/2006
-We are now disconfirmed to play live on the radio February 5th, 2006, supposedly there is something called the Super Bowl that day, which John refuses to miss... We will reschedule to a later date.
-Thanks to everyone that came to our Galaxy Hut show on Sat. It was a great night for us and we are glad so many of you came out to support us!
-Thanks to Dain for filming us, Rachael for doing our make-up and taking pictures, Lary for the free beer and a Sat. night show, The Bonaparte's for being so cordial, Sarah for making it even with Pneumonia, and Rena for taking pictures.

1/11/2006
-We are confirmed to play live on the radio February 5th, 2006...
-The show is called Third Rail and airs every Sunday from 6 to 9pm. The performances are broadcast on air on 88.1FM for local listeners and also streamed live on the internet for global listeners. Fans and audiences are also able to come into the studio to view the performance. All ages are welcome. Our station is located on the University of Maryland campus in College Park, MD.

01/09/2006
-Our film "Terra Luna" along with the music off our EP "Development" will be playing in a new clothing store that has opened up on U Street called Destination U. It's in the Duke Ellington Building. They'll have the film playing on their tv's, along with other material provided by Guin-extraordinaire, Dr. Bacon. They've got some really swank clothing too, so if you're in the neighborhood, check it out. You might also catch Dan in there trying on some jeans.
-The last comment was officially the longest news line in Guin history...!

01/07/2006
-Welcome to the year of The Guin...
-Mastering is being finalized for our EP and the final design for the cd and sleeve have been chosen, check out the music page...
-We are excited to share our music and film with you very soon!

12/28/2005
-The Guins would like to wish you all a fine Holiday season.
-We are hard at work finalizing our EP "Development" and Terra Luna (a film by The Guins).
-We are hoping to have copies for sale at our Jan 14th Galaxy Hut show.

12/15/2005
-Just a little band member news:
-John typically gives his blood once a month, but today the Blood Drive was cancelled due to bad weather.
-Dan has begun conceptual artistic creativity counseling.
-Dr. Bacon has now changed his name to Matthew...
-Michael was drafted in the 166th round to the MLS team The Glitters, Congrats!
-We will be practicing tonight at TA's at around 6pm (Guin Time) all are welcomed to join; brew is always appreciated.

12/14/2005
-It has been said that one in the hand is better than two in the bush. Do all agree?
-We have all but finished the mixing portion of the EP and have now moved on to the illustrious stage of mastering. We are looking for suggestions on the title so please email us with your suggestions.
-Check out the Music page for more information and potential mp3s...
-We are intending the release of the EP coupled with a film titled "Terra Luna" that will run the duration of the 5 song EP. We are expecting it all to be done in the beGUINing of 2006 "The year of The Guin".

12/12/2005
-This is our new website. We hope you like it. Max didn't like our old website. Neither did any of his clones. They said, “Hey guys, you really need a new website.” So, here it is. We're going to keep adding content – audio, video, visual art, "Guinivision" and even a bits of silly nonsense.
-Come one, and come all to our next show at Velvet Lounge this Saturday, December 17th @9pm. Why? Because your mother would want you to.

OLD NEWS (from old website):

December 4 - 2005

~there are some fish that cannot be caught. it's not that they're faster or stronger then the other fish. they're just touched by something extra.
~as always, we appreciate our friends and peers making it out on Thursday night~you're not your job. You're not how much money you have in the bank. you're not the car you drive. You're not the contents of your wallet. you're not your fucking khakis. You're the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world

November 30 - 2005

~wow, has it been that long since we last posted? things they-are-a-busy these days~now that the ep has been mixed (97.6% done) we would like to take a moment to reflect on the experiences we have had over the past few months putting together a cd for mass consumption. reflecting... reflecting...
~alright now that we have finished reflecting, we will be playing tomorrow night at dc9 with Telograph and Lejeune~check out the myspace account for a sample of the ep

November 9 - 2005

~los guins to appear after long recording hibernation. we will be sharing the stage with the illustrious Telograph on Dec. 1, 2005.

October 27 - 2005
~a band once said "art is hard", well, come see for yourself tonight at a gallery opening at the Hickok Warner Cole (1023 31st St) between 5-10 PM. just walk in, look around, be inspired. (the show runs through Nov. 18)
October 26 - 2005

~the guins spent this past weekend in appletown tracking a 5 songs EP to be released this winter (brrrr). we are now engaged in the always tedious process of mixing. we would like to thank Kevin from marcata for his enduring patience, constant enthusiasm and his cool engineer's hat.

~special thanks also to Josh and Hiroko for being very heavy sleepers, Mitchell for being a moneymaker, Pete for the towel, China Place for the nurishment, and Ponch and Jon for helping to clean up the menacing streets of Harlem. keep up the good work boy.

~idaho bob was able to capture a few glorious moments and put them into a video glimpse that now appears on www.myspace.com/theguins.
October 13 - 2005
~and a month will cast doubt on a play for today

~I stole the soul of the mermaid gal
she wishy washed me till I felt as grand as the winds that prevail
i attached to her scales and enjoyed the feeling of being impaled
she showed me the den of the relic fish
I am the texture of a shell
we sang to the moon and set sail:
sail sail
loving gal, loving pal
set the mast and blaze a trail
worrying thoughts never prevail
sail sail
loving gal, loving pal.
sing along till infinity.......

September 19 - 2005
~warm welcome to farmer bob from idaho
~we are going to be in nyc in october to record, so look for a cd release party in november
~a persistent false psychotic belief regarding the self or persons or objects outside the self
~germany now in political turmoil, someone call the supreme court

September 12 - 2005
~thank you GH, bacon's parents, bravo silva and radiohead
~has anyone seen the other half of my steak sandwich?
~the mystery quote was by none other than John Wayne (see sept 6). Noone was able or cared to come up with the answer, good luck next time
~break seal, open bottle, apply orally

September 7 - 2005
~today is september 7

September 6 - 2005
~oh, did we mention we were playing in fairfax tonight (tt reynolds) and Galaxy Hut on Sunday
~free admission to our Galaxy Hut show this weekend if you can name the person to whom this quote is credited:
"Life is hard; its harder if you're stupid"
Hint: its not anyone in the guins
~only 110 days left until christmas
~best gift for 2005: gasoline

August 25 - 2005
~"ca c'est la lune" to Derek and the Metrosexuals for, well, being cherry-eyed
~danger boy made its world debut last night at a lounge called velvet
~the science or art of ordering tones or sounds in succession, in combination, and in temporal relationships to produce a composition having unity and continuity
August 22 - 2005
~break is over, its time to get to work
~MDR at Staccato on Saturday night was better than good.
~would someone please volunteer to make sure Dr. Bacon is adequately hydrated at Wednesday night's show
August 8 - 2005
~thanks to everyone who stayed late into the wee hours of sunday morning to see us play, we hope the new songs made it worthwhile. A 20 song set from a high school ensemble made for a long night
~we would also like to give a special "ca c'est la lune" to t. rex and dane
~ssssssssssss$sssssssssssssss
~we will be taking short break while one of us sets out to spread the gospel of 'guin'ness throughout Europe for a few weeks
August 1 - 2005
~and the day started like any other
~special rattles up to the rattler for sharing their bill
~things we learned on saturday night:
while playing at DC9, never mention other venues you will be playing
when you have 6 people helping load and unload, your back doesn't hurt as much the next morning.
fake rattler rocks!
dr. bacon was sizzling
the earth doesn't move until shaken
July 27 - 2005
~because of our self-designated (and inflated) sense of importance to the DC music community we have added a 'guinspotting' menu option that will list various events, most notably shows, that we are going to make specific efforts to attend. if its up there, its our way of recommending it.
~is that movie about the clones out yet?
~1 <> 2
July 26 - 2005
~hats off (in this case hats on) to the video production side of our live show. last night's video performance by the doctor seemed to pique the artistic curiosities of those in attendance at galaxy hut
~special thanks to 5/4, Telograph, and Middle Distance Runner
~we would like to wish the discovery crew 'god speed' on their journey to space (ca c'est la lune)
~everybody wants to move faster
July 22 - 2005
-the guins are picking up an extra shift this month at Galaxy Hut. its a Monday night and you know what that means...
-if you haven't seen them, see Red Racer. if you have seen them, see them again
-the best part of waking up is that 'moment between lethargy and lucidity', not folgers
-was Jefferson really as smart as Hamilton?
July 19 - 2005
-Michael had only one helmet yesterday, so John could not ride on the back of Michael's motorcycle. You should have seen John, sad and dejected, as Michael pulled away, kicking dust into his tear-stained face with his rear wheel
-Matthew said he got some "good footage." of what, we have no idea
-Mikey is here Mikey is helping us record new songs Mikey navigates by Sonar
-JULY 30th OMG WWBPWRADCN (or We Will be Playing With Rattler at DC9)
-"comparing all my problems to the size of cow"
July 11 - 2005
-the guins would like to welcome the artist bravely known as Matthew to the stage
-"ideas and ideals are not always the same, but they are equally important"
-is anyone else waiting for Shark Week 05? starts sunday.
-middle distance runner
July 1 - 2005
-a guins poem inspired by max

alone with my clone
I: Good morning, clone, would you like a scone?
clone: I will postpone the scone for I must answer the phone.
I: Who is it on the phone, dear clone?
clone: Its just Joan and know how she is prone to droan about the places she's flown.
I: Why must you moan poor clone, I dispise such tone.
clone: Ah, she is speaking of her flight to Cologne and all the glorious movies they'd shown.
I: I see why you groan, she is quite monotone.
clone: Indeed, dry as a bone, how about that scone?
I: Sadly, I ate the lone scone and had I not blown the loan we could get more scones.
clone: How about a muffin and some diet coke?
I: Touche.

June 27 - 2005
- thanks to everyone who came out to Staccato on Saturday. It felt a bit like the UN in there, with people from Denmark, Singapore, Japan, and of course the exotic Brooklyn
- do the worm on necropolis, slam dance cosmopolis, enlighten the populace
- John finished first in number of 'guins' buttons given out without having them thrown back at us.
- new link (Nemo)
June 23 - 2005
-Michael had a cookout with all of his imaginary friends last night. there were a ton of leftovers
-John will be giving a brief summary of scientology at our Stacatto show on saturday
-Dan's new car has a cameo in "Herbie: Fully Loaded", in theaters soon
-hey oprah, the store was closed
June 17 - 2005
-finally some proof that we are still working. we have a couple of new songs that we managed to record in the lap of TA's luxury. please enjoy (songs).
-the graveyard will be minus one next week as dan goes to days. to celebrate, we are getting together sunday night at Galaxy Hut in Arlington (its in the commonwealth).
-john has decided to tell people he grew up in Minnesota
-michael has birthday in two months
June 2 - 2005
- due to the fact that someone thought we were actually scheduled to play with Barry Manilow at the centre de MCI, this fictitious show has been cancelled. sorry mom.
- we should have two new songs ready for the galaxy hut show, if Michael ever learns his parts
- dan recommends the movie "primer" to all his friends (and enemies)
- France said Non, next stop the Netherlands nee
May 20 - 2005
- 2/3 of the Guins were spotted at the Black Kizat last night to see Laura Burhenn and Monorail. these two never disappoint.
- great hanging out with the resplendent katiehateslicorice, scavenger, and of course, the glamourous pool shark derek.
- monday night metrosexuals at Velvet Lounge.
- thanks also to Nan and Max for helping us book Galaxy Hut next month. we are agog about this show.
May 10 - 2005
- #2 Guin Fan... Chris Matthews (they said)
- Manilow threatens to cancel his July 2nd appearence if he is not given top billing over the Guins. Steve Miller has indicated he doesn't care when he plays as long as he gets a fruit plate in his dressing room.
- I hate dirty car mats and invalid use of null- anybody else feeling 'pretty alright' today?
May 4 - 2005
- owwwwww! (in a good way)
- our show at DC9 was a blast. if you haven't already, you need to check out Laura Burhenn and The Metrosexuals. both of these bands were stellar
- thanks to our Space Cab Driver, Ethan, and noteably Gary Moore for his work on the film
- “Thrice a-week, at least, does Gann breakfast in bed — sure sign of pridian intoxication”
April 29 - 2005
-check out an interview with The Guins in the Washington City Paper
-the Guins will be playing DC9 on Tuesday, May 3rd. Add a little "sha-na-na-na" to your week
-keep your eyes on my ba-dunk-a-dunk-dunk
-France is a country of about 60 milliion people, Botswana is not
-rabbit, rabbit
April 27 - 2005
-after careful consideration The Guins now approve the formula E=mc(squared).
-in a relatively stunning move Michael has declared himself president of the moon.
-a new study by the center for studying research has revealed that listening to The Guins makes you stronger, smarter, and can lead to the ability to fly.
-in a related story, The Guins have lost many fans due to a sudden epidemic of people jumping off of tall buildings in Clarendon and DC.
April 20 - 2005
- we'd like to thank everyone who came out to support us at Velvet Lounge. we had a really good turnout, especially for a Monday night! seriously, don't you people have jobs!
-we'd also like to thank ben 16 for putting us in his prayers as he does for all DC bands.
- we're going to begin recording (Exploring) some new songs. Come on, look for them on the website in the next few weeks.
- dan broke his Manwich-only diet last night and had some lasagna. thanks, Sarah!
April 13 - 2005
-our first video is going to be shot on a man-made hand car on home-made railroad tracks. stayed tuned for an explanation. and, yes, TA is involved.
-we are looking into doing some kind of show collaboration with the guys from Walken and Overhead Switch. loads of good ideas.
-personally, I would like to tip my hat to the bloke doing acoustic Blur covers last night at Witlow's...
-that's entertainment
April 05 - 2005
-good news - its starting to smell like spring
-bad new - JAG is going off the air after a glorious 10 year run
-good news - a Manwich has fewer calories than a whopper-bad news - Ryan Adams has a song about SP-good news - ours is better-bad news - Amy/Amy stole the show at DC9 last night-good news - Walken stole it back
March 25 - 2005
-enjoy life or else you will be a miserable human being
-because its his best work to date, we would like to publish a poem by our very own bassist Johnny 'not so rotten' Petro. This piece is entitled 'Struggle for a Gun'. Enjoy.
Struggle for a gun
Arrrghhh,
huhh, urrggg!
Uggghmmm,
eee, owww!
Fuuuug
ihhh, urrggg
Bang!
March 21 - 2005
-holy leaping lizards! Saturday's show at the Laughing Lizard was truly something extraordinary. the Guins played their best show yet, despite Dan's snare drum jumping onto his lap and John's guitar strap deciding to let go. the Rattler followed up with what can only be described as carnage. they were tearing the ceiling down, quite literally! after a show like that, The Guins are going to take some time to regroup, reconsider thier wardrobes, and reorganize their scattered minds.
-the Guins have decided that when the sun sets on their music careers, they are gonig to open a Manwich shop in Arlington. all Manwiches 80 cents.
-Sha-na, na-na, na-na-na, yeah!
March 17 - 2005

-the Guins' show last night at Velvet Lounge was reported to have been even better than Friday night's show at Staccato, according to several sources. the Wading Girl and Delicious played excellent sets as well. there were absolutely no Lynard Skynard songs that were played last night, despite the requests of a Craigslist poster. thanks to Tom, the sound guy, and thanks to T.A., and the USGBC for coming out.
-March 17th is St. Patty's Day: They're always after me lucky charms. or in the immortal words of John Belushi - "I'd like to smash you in the face with my shalali..."
-we very much appreciate everyone who came to our show last night, especially those who came to both, you people are sick.

March 14 - 2005

-thanks to everyone who came to our first show at Staccato on Friday night. we had fun; hope everyone else did as well-we have a new show posted. we'll be at the Laughing Lizard in Alexandria on March 19th-anyone who wants to get onto our mailing list (for news about shows, new songs, etc.) just email us at theguins@theguins.com-Dan was just voted "Sexiest Drummer of the Year" by Beefcake magazine
- we would like to say happy birthday to Ewen Bourse. we hope your 5th day in this world is filled with diamonds and gold.

March 11 - 2005

-we have a show at laughing lizard lounge in olde towne alexandriae next saturday. come enjoy us and the heavy metal stylings of !Rattler!.

March 9 - 2005
-want to go to a Guins show but can't decide which one to go to? The Guins suggest checking out the march 16th show at Velvet Lounge. Why? 1) Velvet is a bigger place and you're more likely to be able to catch a glimpse of Michael doing the "Watoosie". 2) Velvet has $2 Schlitz. 3) Velvet has more parking. 4) Velvet is a stone's throw away from the Green Line (U Street/Cordoza 10th Street exit).

5) At Velvet, we'll be playing with The Wading Girl, a great band from Salem, Virginia (www.thewadinggirl.com). 6) Because T.A. will be there and will be happy to talk to you about what Fall's Church was like in the 60's
March 3 - 2005
-we found ourselves at 'lions' laughing lizard lounge last night in Alexandria playing an open mic. despite our horrid performance, we had a great time and all 5 people there expressed their appreciation. thanks (Hannah, Oliver, LaTeef, Shane etal...). great place for teeth cutting
-Dan spent last night dreaming about hair bands from California-Michael spent last night tuning his guitar-John spends every night correcting grammer and spelling
-what do you think about the events in Lebanon? is the the beginning of real democracy in the arab world?

February 28 - 2005

February 28, 2005-after watching Adam Duritz's performance last night on the oscars, Michael has decided to quit the band and try out for the counting crows
-we found an article on Michael, our singer and guitar player, from the july 2000 issue of spiritual traveler (they said)
-Dan's working the night shift
February 18, 2005- Michael saw 'The Lord of the Rings' for the last time last night - finally understands why everyone refers to him as 'Gollum.'- Dan declares that Jiff is creamier than Peter Pan.

- We may or may not go out this weekend to check out the scene. So, watch out!! And be on your best behavior.

February 16 - 2005

February 16, 2005- John woke up this morning and realized his real name was Avard
- hey KT... who's your favorite local band now? don't answer that
February 14, 2005
- we are in the process of putting together 'scratch' recordings of our new songs- today is valentine's day, go propel the american economy

- also scheduling a show at dc9 sometime in april

Februrary 11 - 2005

February 11, 2005- who knew our bass player had so much in common with John Ashcroft (they said)- we now have a show scheduled for Velvet Loung on the 16th of March (shows)
- today is the 42nd anniversary of Sylvia Plath's self-dismissal